Why Let Society Dictate When You Get Married?


‘Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie has said in her famous books -“You must never behave as if your life belongs to a man. Do you hear me?” “Your life belongs to you and you only” … I could not agree with her more.

As you can already see, keeping my political mouth shut is becoming extremely difficult for me. I haven’t written in nearly over a month, which on my part is very disappointing.

I chose to start MyBreakingViews because I wanted to bring a platform to light for young people to express their own political views; and me being me, I’ve always seen politics as real hard core politics- you know things that happen in parliament but I am now having to take on a broader scope and tell myself that there are more political things out there Ade!

So I’m going to shed light on other political issues that bother me as a young woman within a cultural atmosphere and that’s the politics of young women feeling pressured to get married.

Yes, I can see some people already rolling their eyes (here we go again) some even possibly asking why?! Why am I even talking about this “people already talk about this” but please hear it from my point of view because I think everyone’s story is different.

I am also sure that there are a lot of women and possibly men who by the end of this article, can totally relate to everything I’m saying.

I recently turned 25 and I mean literally recently. For many young girls, that is the ideal age for marriage (at least that is the opinion of many people). In my parent’s generation, it would be seen then as a real tragedy if I wasn’t married at 25! Sadly to some degree, despite the fact that a lot of our parents are not together, despite the high number of broken marriages, despite the fact that some women (and men) actually don’t want to get married, many societies still make it an issue that marriage at a young age is a huge priority!

There are now so many new opportunities for women but today, it is still seen as a complete failure for a woman not to be married at a young age in a vast number of cultures – whether African, Arabic or Asian.

Now why is that?! Why is it a custom that every young woman should not only be married at a certain time and if not, to aspire to? Of course being in a Christian marriage is something that I see myself doing when the time is right, but there is still some stigma and pressuring of young women to make marriage a life time goal! Why?! Have our parents not learnt from their own mistakes?


Have they not seen that chasing your dreams and being ambitious as a women can and is a hugely beautiful and amazing thing? So good for the time we are living in now and can benefit you in the long run?

It really saddens me that I see girls younger than me stressing over the fact that they are not yet married when there is so much more out there to see in this world.

What if you as a women lived your life and I mean really lived your life and didn’t have to bother for one second what a man would think?! How beautiful would that be? What if you travelled, saw the world, grew in your career and loved life for yourself? Would that make you less of a woman because you are not aspiring for marriage?

Don’t get me wrong there are people that are married at my age, even younger than me, but that was their appointed time. I just hate to know that there are young women out there believing that they are nothing because they are not yet married- because that’s just isn’t true!

You are a beautiful woman and you should choose to live your life for yourself and not for any man. When it’s your time, when the time is right for you, it will come, I promise you.

Live for you…

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Facebook Comments


  1. Mary

    September 13, 2016 at 8:05 pm

    Love it!! Keep up the good work girl!!


    • MyBreakingViews

      September 13, 2016 at 8:11 pm

      Thank you so much


      • Belle

        October 10, 2016 at 10:56 am

        I such as the significant data you furnish within your content aril1tes.I&#82c7;ll bookmark your weblog and verify yet again below regularly.I’m relatively certain I will be taught plenty of latest things right right here! Fine luck for the up coming!


  2. Chizor

    September 13, 2016 at 8:08 pm

    Hahahah. Love it. Do you know what though…?Although I am married, I now get pressured into having more children. It seems that I need to be pregnant again before my son is 2. It is between my husband, myself and God. It is like people are never satisified. smh!!


    • MyBreakingViews

      September 13, 2016 at 8:11 pm

      Do you know what I never considered I suppose because I am not married yet, but I suppose you can never satisfy anyone but yourself!


  3. Lexi

    September 13, 2016 at 8:09 pm

    Love it babe! I am constantly asked when I am going to get married and you really feel the pressure at times specially when you are compared to other people that already married at my age! Great article! X


    • MyBreakingViews

      September 13, 2016 at 8:10 pm

      Thank you so much sweetie. I am so glad I was able to speak to a number of women and trust me we are all there but live for you!!


  4. Mariam

    September 14, 2016 at 9:48 pm

    You’ve taken the words right out of my mouth. I’m 28 and I’m being treated like I’m over the hill because I’m not yet married. I’m referred to as ‘girl’ while my married cousin of the same age is a woman. It’s so infuriating to be defined by my attachment to a man. All of my achievements count for nothing all because I don’t have a ring on my finger. 😤


    • MyBreakingViews

      September 15, 2016 at 10:18 pm


      Thank you so much for your comment. Your achievements count for everything keep on doing your best to achieve! You are a wonderful women do not let it stop there!


  5. Tore_Ad

    October 20, 2016 at 5:39 pm

    Love this! Wish people knew that there’s more to life than relationship or rushing to get married. I guess this is why we need to ensure that we are surrounded by Career-minded people. Can’t wait for your next post! x


  6. Kitty

    October 22, 2016 at 9:16 am

    Love it!! You articulately said what’s on my mind! You rock doll! X


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